At this moment in time, Calbert is not a happy camper. Events in life have piled up in a certain order to make me angry… Really, really, r-e-a-l-l-y angry. Frankly, I’d be open to throwing this song lyrics for 31 days thing under the bus, after 7 out of 31 days, and hiding in my blanket fort, ignoring the world and trying not to have a meltdown and break something.

The holidays are never easy on this bipolar boy. This year is the worst, since things have snuck up on all of us. We don’t even realize time has passed, then  BAM we’re almost to Christmas, and what happened to any time to prepare? Or in my case, to develop a strategy to get through the holidays without a total breakdown. I’ll do me, you do you, boo.

I’m struggling. I’m frustrated. I’m angry. I’m depressed. I’m up 40 pounds and there’s no solution in sight.

If you read the entire poem, “Christmas Bells,” by Henry W. Longfellow, you won’t get the positive, “wrong will fail, right prevail” vibe from the carol we sing. But we can choose, can’t we? We don’t sing the entire poem. (Truth be told, we don’t usually sing the whole carol either, which drives me nuts, since it tells a progressive story. C’mon, really???) We can choose, we can find the words to connect with, and the world can keep spinning, singing, moving on its way. And someday, when all is made right and the Kingdom comes, there WILL be peace on earth and goodwill to man.

Until then, we go on, like the phrase from the Ancient Star Song in Calvin Miller’s The Singer: “The world in peaceless orbits sped along, and waited for The Singer and His song.”

I heard the bells on Christmas day
Their old familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace of earth, good will to men.

I thought how, as the day had come,
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along th’unbroken song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And in despair I bowed my head:
“There is no peace on earth,” I said,
“For hate is strong, and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.”

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
“God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail,
With peace on earth, good will to men.”

Till, ringing, singing on its way,
The world revolved from night to day
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime,
Of peace on earth, good will to men.